Last Friday, we had pizza delivered at home. When I placed the order over the telephone, I specifically asked for change for a thousand pesos. When the delivery guy arrived, he had no change with him. Sam had the exact amount and offered to pay. I replaced the one thousand peso bill inside the right pocket of my shorts and forgot about it.
A few days later, Speedy brought the dirty clothes to the laundromat, including the shorts with the thousand peso bill in the pocket. When the clothes were picked up later, the shorts pocket was empty. If you’ve been to a laundry service, you’d know how the system goes. Clothes are sorted and bagged in such a way that every piece is tagged according to who owns it. If the finder wanted to return the money, it would have been easy enough to determine who the owner of the pair of shorts with the thousand peso bill was. In other words, it wasn’t a case of lost property because the owner was not only known but identifiable as well. The adage “finders, keepers” didn’t really apply.
Before you start screaming it was my fault for being such a nitwit, hold your horses. That’s not the point. And don’t say either that I should consider it an unplanned act of charity as the thousand pesos might have helped feed the family of some underpaid laundry worker who probably makes less than a thousand pesos a week. That’s not the point either. I’ll make my point, don’t worry, only a little patience is required on your part. Let me tell you another story before I make my first point.
When Speedy and I were still dating, he told me about the fifteen thousand pesos that fell into his hands by mistake. He was sent by his boss to the bank to make a withdrawal and when he got back to the office, he realized the amount he was given was in excess of fifteen thousand pesos. Because the bank was already closed, he decided to return it the following day.
When he arrived at the bank the next morning, the teller who attended him the previous day was already in the manager’s office. In tears. So when he was finally able to talk to someone to say he had come return the money, the tearful teller went up to him and thanked him profusely. Incoherently was how he described her attempt to thank him.
We were still dating when he told me about it. And I would have thought he was merely trying to impress me with some fairy tale that made him look like a hero and a saint rolled into one had he not shown me a letter signed by the bank manager thanking him for what he had done. It happened. Sometime in 1990 when the value of fifteen thousand pesos was much, much more than what it is today.
So now I come to my first point. Based on the two incidents related above, it is easy to conclude that the unjust taking of someone else’s money may be motivated by need. A person who has little money is more likely to take someone else’s. But is that really the case? Okay, let me tell you a third story.
That time I forgot about the thousand peso bill in my shorts pocket, well, it wasn’t the first time. I’d done it before and I’d done it often. Never mind my carelessness. I know I’m burara but, again, that’s not really the point. If you’ve read my column last Thursday about the two house helpers I fired, let me say in all fairness to them, for all their cheating and lying, thieving has never been among their faults. They checked pockets before anything went into the washing machine and they had returned to me every coin and every bill they have ever found inside the pockets of my shorts and pants. Yes, even one peso coins. And I didn’t have to ask. Most times, I had forgotten about those misplaced bills. But they returned them to me anyway. And I don’t think that those two young women were any richer than the laundromat employee.
And I now come to my second point. It can’t just be a feeling of lack… It can’t simply by a perception of being poor that drives people to take what isn’t theirs because there are poor people who will refuse to steal because it hurts their dignity. And it doesn’t follow either that people who already have enough, people who already have everything they need, won’t try and take what isn’t theirs anyway if there’s an opportunity. Business and government are full of millionaire thieves.
Is it a nature thing? Are some people born with a greater tendency to become thieves in later life? Or is it a character issue irrespective social class and financial situation? Personally, I have no categorical answers. I continue to be intrigued by the gamut of human behavior I come across with every day of my life.
I believe that it’s a matter of character Ms. Connie. Our present househelp, with all their imperfections, are honest and buti na lang kasi I too am burara with money. And they are hard-up too.
Btw, my experience with laundromats is that they choose the “branded” items and since I don’t bother to count the clothes after laundry, ang daming nawawala.
The kids noticed that we’re running low on face towels. I don’t know anymore what the lesser evil is. We’re trying to be less reliant on house helpers so we go to the laundromat and we’re still on the losing side. I think cussing is appropriate under the circumstances.
First, you are blessed with having an honest husband in Speedy.
Honesty is a mark of great character. I believe, it is either one is honest or he isn’t. And honesty is both a “nature and nurture” trait. When one is born and nurtured in a home where honesty is a trait that is connected with the person’s dignity and worth as a person—one rarely departs from that upbringing.
There is something I remember from way back…”I will not cheat, lie or steal even when everyone else around me is doing it.”
Temptations are present in daily interactions—more so, the temptation to steal or appropriate for oneself that which rightfully belongs to some other person. If only people will think twice or ten times at the consequence of doing the negative act: like, his gain will be another person’s loss; or simply doing the grave sin of stealing (isn’t that part of the 10 commandments—”thou shall not steal” and “thou shall not covet your neighbor’s goods,or anything that belongs to your neighbor.” ) We know times are hard. But this should never be reason enough to depart from being morally upright persons.
How can one sleep with a conscience bothering him so…I am also intrigued.
With the amount of cooking and eating going on in our house these days with the workers there, I’ve been frequenting the met mnarkets. Madalas, kung sino pa yung tindera na di marunong magbilang ng pera, yun pa ang suplada at matapang. I would be entitled to only a change of P23, bibigyan ako ng P123. When I call their attention, sila pa itong galit kasi tama daw sila. So, my thinking is, I already did my part, it’s not my fault if di sila marunong magbilang and suplada to boot.
Crisma, I don’t think we are born with a “conscience”. Worse, some people just don’t develop one throughout their lives.
Lemon, this is something I noticed in supermarkets and department stores. If your bill is, say, P299.75 and you hand the cashier P500, the change she’ll give you is P200. Twenty-five centavos might not mean much but, in a day, with say 500 customers, that’s P125. Daily. And how many cashiers in a supermarket or a department store. Imagine an establishment as large as SM Hypermarket or Robinson’s Department Store. Do the cashiers get the excess as bonus — or is it an unwritten policy handed down by management via verbal instructions and it’s really the owner that benefits? And that’s tax free ha.
Sass, I will share with you what is going on behind the scene. Shortchanging is very popular among cashiers. Nobody noticed it since people really don’t care about small change and don’t bother to count. If you insist anyway, the cashier just give you the difference as if nothing happened.
This is the juice, at the end of the day or change of cashier, cash count is done to tie the money to the receipts. Before that happened, the cashier take a break and check for the difference. Since the cashier is liable for any shortage and pays for it, he/she can also pocket the excess money. And if he/she is doing habitually, then you are talking of significant amount at the end of the day.
When I made this observation, it refers only to those who are actually doing it and not all cashiers are like that.
hi miss connie! I’ve worked as a cashier before & I just want to say that the excess change that the customers take or not goes to the cashier in a way of daily allowance, we get that after a month. but we are only allowed to have excess of 1.25 a day, more than that amount I dont know where it goes maybe to the company. but even with that arrangement I usually give the change to the customer even if it’s a centavo. unless I dont have coins to give, I ask the the customer first if it’s ok that I dont have a change to give.I’ve come to think of what you’ve said & it made me feel good that I always get my change even if it’s a centavo, coz then I usually put it in bantay bata coin bank.
Shucks, ain’t the employer obligated by law to provide the allowance? Why is that being passed on to the customers and in such a sneaky way too.
The large excess amount reported by honest cashier went into the books and should have been reported as miscellaneous income (windfall income to the owners). However, the mid level-managers made their own social decisions, so usually it will end-up in a cafeteria fund or any fund for the common benefit of employees (it make sense as long as it will not create incentive for the same employees to generate excess amount, you know how tricky that is when somebody is getting the benefit).
There is a banking law to report to BSP significant but identifiable amount under dormant or unclaimed account (as usual companies are reluctant to tell customers). Most often it doesn’t go that far when traceability in the books can be changed as if it did not happen.
This is the strong point in the US system and the people. You will be surprised that you have money in the state because of overpayment of insurance, utility bill, etc. This is accessible through State website on unclaimed property. And it is easy to claim since the state has your record address and drivers license.
Whoa, that makes me think of the plot of “Swordfish” — billions lying in a dormant account that the government seems to have just forgotten.
A biologist friend said that it’s in the genes. Of course I didn’t verify that. And I believe no one is born evil.
The persuasion to steal, the lack of guilt. Those have been puzzling me about our politicians. I mean how can they sleep at night? And those with “political dynasty” and their kids turn out as corrupt as their predecessors, how does that happen? I wonder sometimes if they have discussions on how to govern “the family way”.
Yah, I also think it’s a “nurture” issue. I remember a phrase — can’t remember anymore from which book — but goes “She learned blackmail at her father’s knees.” So picturesque.
As far as the biologists are concerned each person has unique template, some templates are more predisposed to crime than others.
Dishonesty is easier for the politicians. It is considered as necessary skill based on justification of personal survival and imaginary greater good that needed them. It is even easiest for the children who grew up in that kind of environment of political power and dishonesty.
It is not difficult to see how justification works. Take the case of a governor who claimed credit for the highway infrastructure in his province. He take a cut from all the contractors who happened to be his friends as standard fee for being a contract provider. Not only that he thinks he deserves the amount for getting into that position, but more important he thinks the people deserves him for making the infrastructure happen.
The classic example is the plunder case of President Joseph Estrada. His justification – he did not steal directly from the Treasury or the people. He got P189.7 million commission from the sale of real estate corporation and P545 million from illegal jueteng. For him, he deserve that amount as reward for being a facilitator while he is the president. He served not only the people, but more important he served the special interest groups who filled his pocket.
Actually, I was interested in motives SANS the moral dimension because turning the issue into a moral dilemma won’t give answers because moral standards change from one person to the next.
So, without passing on “right” or wrong”, just what makes people want to TAKE? It’s a fact that NEED is not always the driving motive since those with MORE do it just the same.
Bang on Sassy.
When Princess Diana was alive & the news goes on about how saintly she was, I was thinking she should be! She has every material thing she can ever want, it will be “easy” for her to be “good”.
I know I’m being too simplistic but compared with say the Marcoses, Macapagals, etc. Why do they still feel the need to cheat.
Power corrupts. Nakakapagtaka lang why people would knowingly turn out that way.
“…there are poor people who will refuse to steal because it hurts their dignity…it doesn’t follow either that people who already have enough, people who already have everything they need, won’t try and take what isn’t theirs anyway if there’s an opportunity. Business and government are full of millionaire thieves.” – Ms. Connie
Lemon has a valid point, Ms. Connie. It’s a matter of character. I also believe that God is playing a joke on us Filipinos. Thieves who belong to the ‘masa’ most often land in jail…while big time thieves often land in government positions. Or go scot-free if caught.
From an article written by Rob Purifoy:
The desire and emotion of getting something for nothing is something we likely all have. Advertisers know this which is why we see the word “free” just about everywhere. Most of us love to get a discount and some seek out discounts and free things more than others. Most of us know that to seek out an offer of something for nothing or at a discount is okay, but to take something without it being offered is not right.
We know the legal consequences, and we know generally that it is not morally right and society does not approve if stealing.
This is not to say that advertising leads anyone to do wrong that otherwise would not, it’s just an example of how the emotion works in humans. Many examples of stealing are obvious, the first on the list is necessity. If someone is truly down and out and no help is available, it can cause the mind to tell the person that stealing is the only way out. In reality, there is always help in the form of churches, shelters, and family or friends.
Addiction is another on the top of the list. As we’ve seen with examples of not only people with drug addictions, but also psychological conditions in which even rich celebrities have stolen. People with drug addictions facing catastrophic withdrawal symptoms will do just about anything for the next fix, this usually involves stealing, among other things. And then for some, there are also the mental conditions that make stealing an adrenaline rush for those that have the money to buy an item. Some teenagers chalk up another percentage of ones that steal for both adrenaline or lack of money. The instant gratification prospect comes into play with this type if stealing.
Poverty falls close to the top of list of why people steal as well. If you look at the pirates in Somalia, you have to ask if they even know stealing is wrong. Their attitude is such that if they capture a ship they own it, and if the owner wants it back they have to buy it. In some of these third world countries stealing is a way of life, they are uncivilized, have no societal rules or values and anything goes.
If we study toddlers, monkeys and the otherwise un learned, we can see that stealing may be a basic nature as yet un-tamed by society. When toddlers play they always seem to want what someone else has, it makes it more attractive if someone else has it. They are exhibiting the feeling of jealousy and envy and don’t yet know that they can’t just walk up take something from another. Monkeys may never learn the rule that we humans learn as in their worlds, the strongest get what they want. The biggest monkey gets all the bananas, and that’s just how it is in their world. Which brings the next point, if a child is never taught not to steal will they grow up thinking it’s okay? We’ve all seen the child at the checkout line grab a pack of gum or candy off the point of sale rack and think nothing of it. If mom or Dad says nothing it will teach someone to go with their instincts rather than conform to the rules of society.
I know it sounds odd to bring the point of stealing being an instinct but consider that we still have some instincts from our caveman ancestors. Like the monkey example, cavemen likely fought for their food, stole from others and had no remorse for doing so. Men are hunters, women are gatherers by instinct, and because our way of life has changed we have adapted, but we still get some of our urges from our distant ancestors nonetheless. It is society, and I suppose religion, that has adapted us to defy our own instincts and thus not to steal.
Now, that is interesting.
The argument also raises the moral objections against killing and adultery, the former an extension of the instinct for self-preservation and the latter the baser sexual urge not related to anything spiritual nor the intention to procreate.
The problem though, when the “masa” or the disadvantage started thinking that the rich people are getting richer because of political or big-time thievery, and thus resort to plain and simple thievery as well to get back at the society. Then, we have anarchy.
You can sense this on the reasoning of the simple thieves. They always say they did it because they are so poor.
It’s a Filipino trait that transcends all classes:
Kung makakalusot, lulusot.
I would agree with you if you removed “Filipino” from the statement, which I find offensive.
I agree, it is definitely a trait that transcends all classes and races…
Gusto ko rin palang i-share ung experience ko sa SM Department Store nuon. There was a time na ang pinangsusukli nila ay candies. At may matandang babae akong nakasabay na tinatanong ang cashier kung sa susunod na bibili sya eh pwede nyang ipambayad yung isunukling candy sa kanya. Hindi nakakibo si cashier at sinuklian na lang yung matanda.
Yeah, mayroon nga time na ganoon. Ako, whenever asked by the cashier kung okay lang na kulang ng twenty five centavos ang sukli, I would say “HINDI, HINDI OKAY SA AKIN NA KULANG ANG SUKLI” at hayun maglalabas sila ng sukli exactly sa sukli na dapat na matanggap ko. There was even a time that I really lashed back to one of the cashiers asking if I have P10 so she could give me change of P50. I told her I’m not the cashier and I’m not the one who is selling so she shouldn’t be looking at me to give her change.
It’s okay if it’s weekend — cause banks are close — but during weekdays and it’s like first two hours of operation? Hello! Why did you go to your station without enough for change, when you know for a fact that you’ll need loose change for customers’ payments? Grrrrrrrrr!
Naku, that’s another thing. That exchange of bills so they wouldn’t have to count change. If you’re not fast with mental calculations, you’re sure to get short changed.
haha smart!
I remember years ago when they started giving you candies instead of 25cents… Shocked noon ngayon “norm” na.
A related incident happened just last Wednesday evening—I asked my husband to buy my chocolate morsels and chocolate blocks (cookie ingredients) at a baker’s supply store. Because he didn’t check the receipt and the contents of the plastic bag, the discrepancy was he was overcharged by one kilo of chocolate morsels…than what was inside the plastic bag…so I asked him to go back to the store the following day (good thing it is very near his workplace!) and I said I’d call the store and ask to talk to the cashier whose name was on the receipt. It was good that the person was honest to own up to his mistake and gave the exact number of chocolate morsels needed.
All’s well, and yes, honesty worked!
It boils down to our values…values that we learned & acquired in the course of our day to day life. The same values that our parents and mentors taught us during our childhood years…that slowly faded away because of exposure to this materialistic world.
Sad, but that’s how I see it. I was brought up from a hard up family but my parents told us that it’s not an excuse to steal or to desire more than what we can handle. That no amount of money could make us happy cause the more we get the more we want. Live a simple life and live within your means.
doesn’t this always happen in restos? which is why we have to make it a point to always check the bill before we pay. just the other week in Veneto (MOA branch), our bill included one pitcher of iced tea worth P670 when we did not order nor got any. we called the cashier’s attention and they deleted it without even an explanation, much less an apology. kaka turn off. we ate there regularly and this is what we get? i don’t think we’re ever going back there…
Crisma, that happened to me once. A P25 item was punched as a P200+ item. Buti na lang, before I walked away from the cashier, I checked the receipt and complained right there and then. Hayun, they gave me the difference. Wrong bar code daw. Sus.
Bingbong, I agree it’s upbringing. These days, however, parents are not the only influential people in a child’s life. Many times, the yaya and the TV are more influential.
Lee, my hubby always checks the resto bill too before paying. Me, to do away with change issues, I pay with my credit card. I’m not obliged to leave a tip either.
Haaay naku, another incident of similar nature happened to me at Unimart— I saw the other bars of Baker’s Best margarine with a price of P27.00 while two bars were marked with P76.00!
I went to the customer service and asked why. They promptly responded and said—haay naku,meron na naman sigurong inaantok na taga-lagay ng price tag. They called the price taggers and apologized.
Pero yun ang gusto ko sa kanila, individually priced ang items, unlike the SM and other supermarts na nakalagay na lang sa shelf ang price ng item…
Our recent experience is with neighborhood hardware stores. If your carpenter/worker is not careful, you’ll end up being charged for items not bought. Mga tindera kasi sa hardware ang hilig umalembong, kaya yan mali-mali lagi, hehe.
Ms. Connie, it really pisses me everytime I purchase from SM Hypermart or Dept Stores and the cashier would be asking for exact change or a smaller bill. I would retort back to them, “di ba may bangko kayo, referring to BDO? bakit di kayo bigyan ng panukli?” It may be a scheme. Not that of the cashier, but of the company. If you add up in a day all the loose coins they were not able to give to their customers, it becomes a big amount! Yes, using your credit card is the answer here.
As for the waiters of restaurants that give pleasant and sincere service (coz this shows), I really don’t mind giving a tip.
We are building kasi a house in Montalban and our workers are people who looks like they need the money, although the skills are not that great. Pero sa kanila pa din kami nagpagawa kasi naaawa ako. When they ask for cash advance, bigay kami. One time, gave instructions to get 1 sack of cement and they got 3, sa kanila yung 2.Pinalusutan pa talaga kami! Galit na galit ako, pero my husband didnt want me to confront them. So hindi na kami nagpagawa ulit sa kanila kahit lagi silang nagpupunta sa bahay.
Lemon & Dinah, when it comes to construction, WE BUY the materials. Or we order them and have them delivered. Everything itemized in the invoice.
Jazzie, they do that gimmick everywhere these days — including and especially fast foods.
Hi Ma’m Connie,
Honesty is learned at home and at an early age.
I hope that this incident about the pizza delivery we had last night is relevant to the topic… You know how this pizza chain promises “hate late. we deliver on time or your pizza is free.”
Our pizza was supposed to have reached us at 7:17 pm. Shortly after that, the customer relations officer called us and apologized for the delay because the rider had engine trouble. Another rider then took over and delivered the pizza (no longer hot) at nearly a quarter to 8 pm.
My husband said I should have persisted and asked that our pizza should have been free. We weren’t even offered any discount or any freebie. I paid P650.00.
I said, siguro nataon lang na good mood ako last night. Kung nataon na bad mood ako, then they could have heard some words they ought to hear…some real bad words.
Then this morning, I called them again and told the person on their call center about the situation. I even said, maybe kung ibang tao lang yun, talagang mag-iinsist ng free pizza.
Question: Do you think, they called us up para ma-spare sila ng pagbigay ng free pizza because they were really late? Para lang meron silang excuses, smooshes? The rider who delivered said “nawalan po ng gas, Ma’am…”
Di sana alisin na lang nila yang “hate late na yun… or our pizza is free raw, o…” Hmmp… even if their pizza is good, meron naman sigurong ibang pizza companies.
Naku, ha, that is FALSE ADVERTISING if they’re going to renege on their promise with a phone call and an apology. A guarantee is a guarantee.
Aha! That was quick…the manager just called me up and reiterated the apologies for the incident.
She promised that a free pizza will be delivered to us.
How’s that for customer relations that they wish to maintain…
She said the incident was not reported to her last night.
Oh, ok, I am still in a good mood after all—
O, let us know if the free pizza really gets delivered. I hope it’s not an empty promise. Otherwise, pucha, para namang kasalanan ng customer if they have vehicle trouble, ano?
Yes, it was delivered— hot and fresh! Yun nga lang, it wasn’t the same flavor as the one we previously had…oh well, a free pizza is a free pizza. And family size pa rin!