Perceptions and images of women

In a television commercial, an attractive young woman calls out “Darling” to the out-of-focus image of a man in the crowd. She runs to him, he picks her up, she tells him she missed him and he says the same to her. The camera focuses on his face which, in wry Filipino humor, would be described as a face only a mother could love. Next comes the message that more women suffer from eye damage than men. The young woman goes to Executive Optical (EO), gets glasses, sees her beau clearly and looks confused as though wondering if it was indeed him.

The first time I saw the EO commercial, I laughed. It was definitely attention-grabbing and able to deliver the message succinctly through visuals – an effective application of a good understanding of human psychology via a vis the visual medium.

But what was the message, exactly? I thought hard about whether there was attempt to stereotype and whether there was a hidden insult to women somewhere. But I couldn’t find any. In fact, it is a praise to women as represented by the young woman who loved a man even before she knew how he looked exactly. Had the commercial ended with a break-up of the couple after she saw him clearly for the first time, I’d draw different conclusions.

In short, apart from effectively marketing its products and services (I am not a paid mouthpiece for EO, by the way), there is that clear message that an attractive young woman is not necessarily shallow nor dumb. Smart strategy, really, not to appeal to the vain side of women because eye glasses are not fashion accessories despite what the manufacturers of horrendously priced designer frames want us to believe.

Now, let me go to another representation of women, this time on the internet which, despite the protestations of snobs in traditional media, has just as much, if not more, viral effect in disseminating information, misinformation, prejudices and stereotypes.

In the e-mail loop, there is a message entitled “3 ways to spot a millionaire” which contains three attached photos: One, the backs of swimsuit clad man and woman holding hands – the woman has a body that can land her in a swimsuit pageant; the man is obese. Two, a wedding photo of a beautiful young Middle Eastern woman wearing a skimpy beaded white gown and a cross-eyed old man with a bulbous nose. Three, a poolside shot of a nude pair – a sexy blonde and a male midget.

The images may be have been photoshopped (obviously, some say) but the mindset of the original source and everyone else who forwarded the message is clear: beautiful and sexy young women will only go for bad-looking men if they are rich. If they weren’t, they wouldn’t even merit a second glance.

A number of women to whom the e-mail had been forwarded did not find it funny and the ultra-feminists are literally up in arms (okay, maybe, I know too many of them). Unfair representation of women? Unfair attempt to stereotype, yes (although it is a matter of perception whether there is such an attempt), but the underlying thought is not altogether untrue.

Some women are gold diggers and they make no bones about it. It’s not a moral issue for many but a practical consideration. I’ve heard a lot of mothers tell their daughters that they ought to marry someone rich and the message is drummed into the little girls’ ears as they grow up. There is even a certain amount of pressure as these are not casual advices. A girl from a poor family is egged on to find a rich husband so she provide a better life for her parents and siblings. A girl from a rich family is raised to believe that a poor husband is beneath the expectations of the parents and, therefore, socially unacceptable. Heck, it’s something so well-entrenched in our culture that we don’t even flinch when we’re confronted with it in the plots of movies and telenovelas.

Even fairy tales have their share of gold diggers. Cinderella was as much of a gold digger as her stepmother and two stepsisters. She didn’t want to marry just any young man – she wanted the prince who would one day be king, for goodness’ sakes. And just how many versions of Cinderella are there in modern popular culture? Weren’t you one of those who smiled dreamily and sighed happily in that final scene of Pretty Woman when Richard Gere “rescued” Julia Roberts? Is it less of gold digging if the man in question also happens to be good looking? Sus naman. Bonus na lang yun.

And it’s not like gold-digging is a newly sprouted phenomenon. It’s the stuff that “coming out” and debutante balls of old were made of (the reverse is somewhat true today as these events are now largely an exhibition of how much money a girl’s family has). And “gold” does not always mean money exclusively. It can include political power and social stature. Read history books and find real-life examples of how rich girls were married off by their parents, and provided with substantial dowries, to impoverished squires who had nothing to boast of but centuries-old titles.

Women will always be portrayed differently, and in countless ways, depending on the thinking of each and every person who makes the portrayal. Some will appeal to certain quarters; others will anger the rest. Unless we start brainwashing the world population to conform to a certain way of thinking, perceptions will always differ.